Without getting into specifics, I'm feeling compelled to write about what's going on a bit with my personal life and what I'm feeling. Randy and I have had some issues, and we are working at trying to resolve them. It's going slowly, but I think we're going in the right direction. It's hard for me to see what's waiting at the finish line tho'.
Randy has a very busy life - he has a lot of friends, interests and ambitions. He also has a lot of personal stuff going on. I think he's too busy for a girlfriend (although I can't say we are boyfriend/girlfriend. I don't know what our label is...). I feel left out of his loop a lot. His schedule is usually booked full... and even tho' I know that he would do anything I asked him to, I feel not-very-high on his Important Scale. Just the same, when we are together, I do enjoy the time I spend with him.
I think that the fact that his job situation is up in the air makes things more complicated. There is a good chance that he will probably move out-of-state. Is it worth pursuing a relationship that has no concrete goal? I don't think that I'm looking for anything too exorbitant in life... New York politics and taxes really suck, but I am happy where I am. The area is nice, my family is here and I don't really want to move. I want to get my house fixed up and be able to have time to enjoy friends, family and hobbies. I want to get llamas. I want to build and share the rest of my life with someone I love and who loves me.
I don't have a clear picture on that right now. It's hard knowing what you want and not being able to see it.
That being said, I'm hoping for the best-case scenario.
Last night we had a date night. Randy arranged a whole evening of fun for us and I had a really great time. The whole night was a surprise for me and it was revealed to me part by part.
The first thing he had planned was a visit to a corn maze. I've never been to a corn maze before, and have always wanted to go through one - so I was totally stoked when I saw what we were going to do. It was a bit on the muddy side, which we weren't prepared for, but that made it all the more fun. There were three mazes and we made it through two of them. Next year, I would love to go again when it's not muddy and at night with a flashlight!
The next part of the date was dinner at Famous Dave's. Whenever I go out to eat, my eyes are always bigger than my stomach. Dinner was totally yummy and it was fun trying all the different kinds of barbecue sauces. It was like trying all the different pancake syrups at Perkins :)
The grand finale of the evening was a show at the Lancaster Opera House - the Little Shop of Horrors. It was a great show. I've seen commercials for it on TV and knew a little of the theme song from them and I knew it was about a talking plant - but that was it. Now I know the story :) I really enjoyed the show and the music. I'm going to have the songs going through my head all week :P
It was a really nice evening and I felt very special.
Next it's my turn to plan Date Night. I hope I can come up with a night just as fun for Randy as he made it for me last night.
My wish: To be able to enjoy a whole lifetime of Date Nights.
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